1962 At The “Hole”

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The Hole

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"WHY AM I HERE IN MY CAVE?"

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Well I've described the pain, the soreness, the fatigue and nausea and brain fog. I still think I can un-will the god awful fatigue, so far FM is IN CHARGE. I've been working on this for 20 years to no avail. Until June 2007 the treatment for FM was Pain Management, Physical Therapy (swimming etc), and ANTIDEPRESSANTS. Pain management consisted of getting the drug of your choice, for most it is Lortab. And that's all good. Pain Management Doctors, is in my opinion are nothing more than "drug pushers" with a "White Coat" and a "Prescription Pad" and don't forget their Medical Degree. Treatment by a Pain Management Doctor can be cut off at any time with little or no reason given. I take one Prescription for FM. All the rest are for Depression, Insomnia and Anxiety. I can't expect the Shrinks to know "they can't fix a black whole", the Black Whole is an endless spiral of emptiness", if the Black Whole is empty, n
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"I LIKE MY CAVE"

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My Cave is actually the Master Bedroom in my house. I guess most people would think of "A Cave" as being dark with no view. I know, I know, most "Caves" are underground, but not mine. I really haven't been out side of my Cave for about 2 and a half years. Since my Father died here at home. It's great, no Cave is complete without a Laptop and Printer, Refrigerator, Office supplies, Cleaning Supplies, Dog Food and Treats, and Trailmix Bars. I don't venture out much, my "Socials" consist of Publix Grocery, Wal Mart, Pharmacy, my Bank, the Vet and the Groomer. And I feel as though I am living large. I have 3 dogs, a toy Poodle, a Bichon and a White Westie. It's me and the boys. I have had FM for 20 years now. The soreness, nausea and restless legs keep me from finding a "position of comfort" - sometimes I just stand up for hours. When I am not standing I am bouncing around from room to room. It's not so bad now, it
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FibromyalgiaAndConnieJean’sCave

Well after being in my Cave since my last post on May 25 th , 2008 today, July 7, 2008 I am able to sit at my desktop and enjoy the moment. My Doctor prescribed 2 (two) new head drugs in the last 2 weeks. Yuk!!! Everyone knows it takes a month or more to adjust to new head drugs. I recently bought a new car, a 2008 STS Cadillac. Too bad the pain keeps me from going for a joy ride with my boys, Mr. Pierre, Lucky and Tickerboo. Toy Poodle, Bichon and White Westie Highland Terrier. My Primary Care Doctor sent me a letter, "signed return receipt" on July 2, 2008 telling me to call and set up an appointment NOW. So I will. I will. Getting Old Is Not For Sissies. No sleep at all last night, even after night time meds. I am "the nutcase in the family" – sounds weird because my Elders are all gone. I cared for them, buried them. Gee, I guess this makes me the Matriarch…….. This Matriarch will stay in the Cave. Until I get well. I pray every day for well
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